Mr. H. Salsich
9 English
18 February 2009
We're All Affected:
An Essay on the Affects of Music On Caliban and Myself
1: Throughout history, music has been an art form used universally as a form of expression. 2: Though the styles and genres of music have changed over the years, the purpose of this art form has remained the same. 3: Almost anyone may tell you that they love music, but when you ask what about it affects them, they may not have an answer. 4: The truth is that though we all love music, it is not often that we think about what particularly affects us. 5: The sounds of music can change almost anyone, including me, or even a creature such as William Shakespeare’s Caliban.
TS: Though music has an affect on most of us, this was particularly pronounced in Caliban. SD: The music seems to change Caliban’s entire perspective. CM: Usually, he is angry and cold, but when he hears the music, his cruel demeanor melts away. CM: Something about the “twangling instruments” makes him forget everything bad in his life. SD: When Caliban hears music, it puts him to sleep and makes him dream extraordinary dreams. CM: He thinks that the skies were dropping riches upon him, all because of the music surrounding him. CM: When he finally awakens, he “crie[s] to dream again.” SD: This all goes to show that even a bad person can be transformed by something as powerful as music. CM: As the notes wash over him, Caliban, usually so cold and cruel, suddenly becomes thoughtful and kind (Appositive S-V split). CM: Whatever it is about the music that affects him, Caliban is an entirely different person when he hears the “sweet airs.” CS: No one would ever know that something as simple as music could make someone like Caliban so sensitive and considerate.
TS: Like most people, music has an enormous affect on me. SD: Hearing a certain song can instantly change my mood, possibly sending my emotions in an entirely different direction. CM: When I am feeling sad, I listen to something upbeat to excite me, or to a mellower tune which can help me to unwind and relax. CM: The beats and notes dive inside me and bring me alive (Short sentence in the midst of long ones). SD: In contrast, I often find that instead of the music affecting my mood, my mood affects my music (Chiasmus). CM: If I am feeling energetic or excited, I may listen to someone such as Billy Joel or The Format, whereas if I feel calm, I would probably put on Joshua Radin or Dispatch. CM: It is usually easy to tell how I am feeling based on the music I am listening to. SD: Like Caliban, music can put me to sleep. CM: After a long day, I often lie down on my bed, put on my sleep playlist, and close my eyes, letting the music surround me. CM: Try as I might to stay awake, the soothing melodies lull me into a contented slumber, and everything around me seems to give way to the music (Compound-complex sentence). CS: Inside my mind, in the music itself, and all around me, the music becomes my refuge (Parallel prepositional phrases).
1:For me, music is everywhere. 2:Even if I am not listening to a song, I may have one in my head, or I might be listening to my footsteps as they tap out a beat, the foundation of a new song. 3: It holds so many memories, such as a funny moment you had with a friend while listening to a certain song, or that one summer when that certain song was playing on the radio constantly. 4: Though we all have unique tastes in music, when a beautiful song starts to play, everyone in the room knows it, and for a few minutes, we all have an unspoken connection in our souls.
TS: Though music has an affect on most of us, this was particularly pronounced in Caliban. SD: The music seems to change Caliban’s entire perspective. CM: Usually, he is angry and cold, but when he hears the music, his cruel demeanor melts away. CM: Something about the “twangling instruments” makes him forget everything bad in his life. SD: When Caliban hears music, it puts him to sleep and makes him dream extraordinary dreams. CM: He thinks that the skies were dropping riches upon him, all because of the music surrounding him. CM: When he finally awakens, he “crie[s] to dream again.” SD: This all goes to show that even a bad person can be transformed by something as powerful as music. CM: As the notes wash over him, Caliban, usually so cold and cruel, suddenly becomes thoughtful and kind (Appositive S-V split). CM: Whatever it is about the music that affects him, Caliban is an entirely different person when he hears the “sweet airs.” CS: No one would ever know that something as simple as music could make someone like Caliban so sensitive and considerate.
TS: Like most people, music has an enormous affect on me. SD: Hearing a certain song can instantly change my mood, possibly sending my emotions in an entirely different direction. CM: When I am feeling sad, I listen to something upbeat to excite me, or to a mellower tune which can help me to unwind and relax. CM: The beats and notes dive inside me and bring me alive (Short sentence in the midst of long ones). SD: In contrast, I often find that instead of the music affecting my mood, my mood affects my music (Chiasmus). CM: If I am feeling energetic or excited, I may listen to someone such as Billy Joel or The Format, whereas if I feel calm, I would probably put on Joshua Radin or Dispatch. CM: It is usually easy to tell how I am feeling based on the music I am listening to. SD: Like Caliban, music can put me to sleep. CM: After a long day, I often lie down on my bed, put on my sleep playlist, and close my eyes, letting the music surround me. CM: Try as I might to stay awake, the soothing melodies lull me into a contented slumber, and everything around me seems to give way to the music (Compound-complex sentence). CS: Inside my mind, in the music itself, and all around me, the music becomes my refuge (Parallel prepositional phrases).
1:For me, music is everywhere. 2:Even if I am not listening to a song, I may have one in my head, or I might be listening to my footsteps as they tap out a beat, the foundation of a new song. 3: It holds so many memories, such as a funny moment you had with a friend while listening to a certain song, or that one summer when that certain song was playing on the radio constantly. 4: Though we all have unique tastes in music, when a beautiful song starts to play, everyone in the room knows it, and for a few minutes, we all have an unspoken connection in our souls.
2 comments:
Lydia,
Your essay was very well put together and pleasant to read. I especially liked how you said that Caliban's "cruel demeanor melts away" because it was very good imagery. A suggestion would be to add something to the last sentence of your opening paragraph because it suggests that your whole essay will be about Caliban, which it is not. Also, the second half of your second sentence in your concluding paragraph doesn't have a subject, so you may want to change that. Anyways...great job!
Lydia,
Your easy was very nice, and had a nice and smooth flow to it all. I especially liked your sentence, "The beats and notes dive inside me and bring me alive". I do have a few suggestions tho. In one of your sentences you said when im "sad and down," I think it sounds a tad bit awkward and maybe you should delete one of them. Also, I thought that this sentence was a little awkwardly placed- " It is usually easy to tell how I am feeling based on the music I am listening to." Besides that, your essay was great!
Post a Comment