English 09
Hamilton Salsich
26 May 2009
“Five years […], five summers, […] five long winters.” What would you do if you returned to your old school, and it was abandoned? What would you do if you didn’t remember anything about your old school, and when you did, you didn’t care in the least? If I was to visit Pine Point in five years I would probably have the same reaction as William Wordsworth when he visited his beloved, enchanted place- Tintern Abbey.
TS In the poem “Tintern Abbey,” by William Wordsworth, one strong theme is painted into his writing- reminiscing. SD “The day [had] come when [he]” decided to revisit his serene and secluded church. CM Five years had blinded him from his enchanted place, five years grew unwanted grass on the floors, five years abandoned this once famous church. CM “Through a long absence,” his once get-away-escape had transformed from a beautiful, blessed church, to a bare, roofless estate. SD Wordsworth had never truly forgotten about Tintern Abbey, but thinking about those five years that had already passed in which he didn’t visit the church, made him think. CM He would visit the church to get away from everything- to escape from his busy, bustling life [Alliteration]. ÇM He remembers the “feelings […] of unremembered pleasure” that the church and the luscious [FAST] nature around it would vent off, and wishes he would have kept to his tradition of visiting this majestic [FAST] place. CS Sure Wordsworth cannot rewind the last five years and keep to his promise towards the Tintern Abbey, but at least he was able to remember and feel the same tranquil feeling as he did five years ago.
TS Five years from now I hope to come to Pine Point to not only find all of my old teachers, but I want to be able to sit on Doc’s creaky couch, play basketball on the squeaky gym floor, play bongos in Ms. Lozis’s room, and I want to be able to dance across the ever so famous stage. SD All of these places have so much meaning and many memories [Alliteration] built into them. CM “The day [will] come when I [make my voyage back to Pine Point] again [and] repose here.” CM If I was to return and see no stage, no Mr. T, no gym, and no couch or bongos, I would be devastated beyond my capacity. SD Reminiscing on the past would be the only thing that will keep this school alive in my memory, and like Wordsworth, I will have to treasure what’s left of the beauteous landmark even “[t]hough changed, no doubt, from what [it] was.” CM I have been at Pine Point for twelve years and, truthfully, this school just isn’t the same- the Big Toy isn’t lying in the pebbles and the Black Top isn’t being played on anymore [Loose Sentence]. CM After going through these hard changes I’ve learned that changes can be for the better, but you must always prize [FAST] those fond memories you’ve had. CS All of the changes that will happen at Pine Point will be for the better, and we must learn not to carry “the heavy and […] weary weight” of being stuck in the past.
TS In the poem “The Writer” by Richard Wilbur, it has many of the same themes and virtues [FAST] as Wordsworth does in “Tintern Abbey.” SD “[Wilbur] remember[s] the dazed starling[,] which was trapped in that very room” and was “humped and bloody.” CM This small remembrance stayed fastened in his memories- the “iridescent creature” flies through his thoughts. SD One day he “hear[s] […] a commotion of type-writer keys” from his daughter’s bedroom and it brings him back to the very day “the dazed starling” entered his heart. CM Every pause his daughter made brought him back to when he doubted the bird’s health and boldness [FAST]. CM Every swipe of the type-writer brings him back to that vivid scene in his mind, almost as though he is portraying his daughter as the “iridescent creature.” CS This “starling” has taught Wilbur to never give up on himself, no matter how tough the situation. CS2 Even if a vivid scenery in his mind has changed overtime into his daughters life, he must learn to trust her bravery and freedom and let her “lift[] off from [his memories] […and] beat a smooth course for the right window.”
Small, pointless objects found anywhere can trigger my memory of Pine Point School. I hope to never lose any of the lessons I’ve learned here or any of the memories I’ve made here. I know that Pine Point will change immensely [FAST] over the next few years, but I hope to be like Wordsworth- come back to this wondrous place and take in all of the fond memories I’d had there. “Nor wilt thou then forget, that after many wanderings, many years of absence, [this school] were to me more dear, both for themselves and for thy sake!”
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Self Assessment
1.) In this essay I was working on sticking to the point, and using the tools efficiently. I normally stick in tools out of place, or stick them in incorrectly. In this essay, I just wrote it through and picked out tools I thought worked.
2.) I liked my extra credit body paragraph. I think I used brief quotes accordingly and styed on focus. I also liked my opening paragraph- using two questions will keep the reader thinking.
3.) My weakness in this essay would have to be my concluding paragraph. I had a hard time summarizing everything, since there was so much material.
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