Ceilie's Exam Essay

Ceilie Moore
Mr. Salsich
English 9
June 4th, 2009

Riding the Unexpected Wave:

An Essay on a Poem and Two Characters from Two Stories

We have our schedules, our calendars, clocks and alarms. We use these tools to plan for things, to alert us when it is time to continue on to our next activity and to tell us when something is about to happen. But there are those things, good and bad, that we just can’t jot down on a calendar square or plug into our planner. In William Stafford’s poem, “Yes,” he explains the pros and cons of these unexpected events, while characters in Charles Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol” and Katherine Mansfield’s “The Garden Party,” experience them for themselves.

In Dickens’, “A Christmas Carol,” the main character Ebenezer Scrooge doesn’t understand the value of life and all of what comes with it. He lives holed up in his house full of anger and vacant of joy (Antithesis), dwelling on the past. Stafford speaks in his poem of the unexpected disasters that “could happen any time,” and Scrooge was a victim of an unplanned catastrophe when his only friend lost his life. For a series of nights, ghosts took Scrooge to see his unfortunate past, pitiful present and the future result of his uncivil behavior. (Purposeful Repetition of an adjective and a noun) After seeing his ill-fated future, Scrooge awoke and suddenly appreciated every ounce of goodness he had been ignoring. He had come to the conclusion that bad things “could happen any time,” but good ones, such as “sunshine, love [and] salvation” could too. Scrooge had lived a majority of his life cursing the world for the unexpected passing of his dear friend, but in the end he realized that the finer things in life can be as much of a surprise as the terrible ones.

In Mansfield’s short story, “The Garden Party,” Laura, a young, compassionate girl, is immune to the unexpected arrival of a good thing, but shaken by the abrupt entrance of a bad one. Laura is planning her first garden party, which is an honor and rite of passage in the world she lives in. On the day of the party, it is brought to her attention that a man, one she had never met, died on the street near her house. Growing up in such an affluent environment, Laura had barely been exposed to something as austere (FAST) as death. She had never understood the power of such an unexpected event, because while others lived with “no guarantee in […] life,” Laura lived with nothing but what was to be predicted. Even when something unplanned did occur, the suddenness of it was masked with luxury and lavishness (FAST). This death not only taught Laura about the unfortunate, unanticipated occurrences in life, but the precious ones as well. Throughout this traumatic experience, Laura came out with the appreciation for the “bonuses” that come with her life, such as “morning, […] noon, […] evening,” and money and security and shelter (Polysyndeton). Although Laura had to learn the hard way about the difficulties of an unexpected situation, she emerged from it all with the newfound value for all the “bonuses” and “guarantees” she has.

The unexpectedness of death, “tornado[es],” war and “earthquake[s]” can make the devastating situation, that much more wretched. The surprise of “love,” friendship and “salvation,” can make the joyous occurrence that much more pleasurable. And sometimes, it’s just the added “bonus” of “sunshine” on a day that was supposed to be cloudy, that just makes you appreciate the little things in life. Learn a lesson from Stafford, Scrooge and Laura and remember things don’t always go according to plan, but with another surprise, it can all be turned around.

Lydia's Exxam Essay

Lydia Schulz
Mr. H. Salsich
9 English
June 4, 2009

Finding a Place:
An Essay on a Poem, a Poet, and Sonny

What do you have to do to find your place in the world? Do you have to overcome obstacles, or is your fate right in front of you, waiting for you to see it? Either way, finding your calling is not an easy task. In his poem “The Real Work,” Wendell Berry describes the fact that you may have to make an effort to find your place, a lesson that both Rainer Maria Rilke and Sonny are aware of.

“The Real Work,” by Wendell Berry only consists of six lines, but within this short poem, you can find many life lessons. The first half of this poem talks about finding your calling. When you are always looking for answers, you may dismiss something you have had all along. If we put aside this search, “we no longer know what to do,” and with this blessed ignorance, “we have come to our real work.” The last two lines of this poem, in which Berry states “the mind that is not baffled is not employed. / The impeded streams is the one that sings,” remind me of a Native American proverb I have seen in Mr. Williams’ classroom. The proverb says that “the soul would have no rainbow if the eyes had no tears,” meaning that to become a better person, you must overcome adversity (Loose Sentence). You may suffer in this process, but you will come out a stronger and wiser person than you were before. Occasionally, all you need to do to improve your life is to take stock of what you have and fight for what you deserve (purposeful repetition).

This poem reminds me of two people we studied at the very beginning of the year: Sonny, from James Baldwin’s “Sonny’s Blues,” and Rainer Maria Rilke. In our first essay assignment, we wrote about a passage by Rilke, which told readers not to “search for the answers” you already have. Like Wendell Berry, Rilke is encouraging readers to let the answers come to them instead of spending all their time looking for them. If you are always searching for the answers, you may miss the ones that were sitting in front of you the entire time. A significant connection this poem has with “Sonny’s Blues” is the last line: “the impeded stream is the one that sings.” Sonny had a rough patch in life, dealing with drugs and life as a musician (participle), which culminated in his incarceration (FAST). When Sonny finally got clean, he was able to use all of what he went through in his music, contributing such raw emotion to his performances. Sonny did some terrible things, but when he stopped looking for a way to fit in, he found his place.

Nothing in life is free, but this doesn’t mean that we should spend our lives searching for answers we will never find. Life may throw obstacles at us, but it is up to us to rise above it all and change for the better. Yes, life can be tough, but this is no reason to give up our right to live. Keep fighting, and always remember to acknowledge what you already have.

Timmy's Exam Essay

Timmy O’Brien

Mr. Salsich

English 9

4 June 2009

 

The Luck of the Draw:

A Poem’s Relation to Two Fictional Lives

 

         In life, there is nothing but chances. You do not know your future, and you make decisions based on what you hope and expect to see there. Both Dexter Green and Ebenezer Scrooge had chances, and they took them differently. The choices they made have a connection to the poem “Yes” by William Stafford.

         In the short story “Winter Dreams” by F. Scott Fitzgerald, Dexter Green had many chances to take. He started out as a caddy at a local country club, and meets the love of his life, or so he thinks. He falls in love with Judy, and she is his “sunshine, love, [and] salvation.” Then it all falls apart. He experiences the “tornado, earthquake, [and] Armageddon” that Stafford says can “happen any time.” Judy leaves him, and Green is plunged [FAST] into a dark time of despair and hopelessness. Even as he builds himself more and more wealth, he feels as though something is missing from his life. Throughout his existence, he experiences “love” and “Armageddon” and finally learns that there are “no guarentees in [his] life.”

         On the contrary, Ebenezer Scrooge – a character in Charles Dickens’ “The Christmas Carol” – reflects this poem in a more positive light [appositive]. In his adult life, the assiduous [SAT word] Scrooge has known nothing but “tornado[es]” and other destructive forces. His entire working life has been spent sheltered in his dreary shop, with nothing to brighten the mood, not even an extra coal on the fire. He is totally, utterly, hopelessly depressed, and there is no way out for him [tricolon], or so it seems. One night, a mysterious ghost comes to him and tells him about the Christmas’ of his past. The next night, another ghost makes him see his present Christmas’, and the night after, he is shown his Christmas’ to come by a final ghost. The sad times behind and ahead of him are somewhat inspiring, so he breaks out of his shell an helps a child in need. In this book, Scrooge starts out as lonely person, but by sharing his wealth and happiness, he emerges and experiences the “bonuses” of “morning,” “noon,” and “evening,” by saving a life that would have been be otherwise lost – Tiny Tim.

         When Green gained Judy and lost her soon after, it was all chance. When Scrooge made the decision to help the boy, it was based on chance. Both of their lives were made around the process of not knowing what was to come. All they were able to do was keep thier mind, eyes, ears, and heart [tetracolon climax] open and hope for the best.

Sarahs Second Post =]

Lydia's idea of listing memories with everyone in the class, was a very brilliant idea, so I think I will try to do the same.

Hannah- All of our fond Jonas Brother moments, and seeing Miley Cyrus in concert

Kyle- ABERCROMBIE AND FITCH MOMENTS and you dressing up as Paris Hilton (haha)

Teddy- Three words * voice over command *

Lydia- Dancing to Usher at Ceilie's house, me waking up in the morning to a face full of drawings thanks to you, Scarlet and Ceilie

Scarlet- sipping red bull, making awesome videos and dancing in the rain

Anna- "Who stole my wig, whoever did shall pay"

Parker- Going to six flags, making you go on Superman

Gabe- wrestling with Shian and Amber, and our "awkward" times with Sofia at your house

Rashad- "pop champagne" and 

Julie- shampoo bottles...hehe=] and shopping with the frenchies

Kate- chhhhheeeetahliscious!

Caroline- we've had way too many memories hun, but the one that first came to mind was snowboarding in Vermont (well attempting to) 

Zack- TRICK-OR-TREATING

Eleanor- KIDZ BOP!

Tristan and Timmy-  This goes for you both because our play we made (along with Hannah) was so unbelievably awesome I almost died

Kimo- arguments... many many arguments 

Olivia- halloween parties, feeling 

Ty- nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom....and so on.

Wendell- Getting sugar high in downtown Westerly off of ice cream, soda and pizza

Ceilie's Essay #21

Ceilie Moore

Mr. Salsich 

English 9

May 28th, 2009

 Remembering the Place That Shaped Us:

My Last Essay On a Poem and My Life

Remember that special place that you spent years of your life, growing, learning and becoming the person you are today? Remember how one day, you just stopped going there for one reason or another, and then watched as it became covered in dust and vines of ivy started growing up the sides? Go back there, go back to that special place and relive every second you had there, reminding yourself why you loved it and had to leave it. That’s what William Wordsworth did with “Tintern Abbey” and that is what I hope to do years from now with Pine Point.

TS In William Wordsworth’s, “Tintern Abbey” a major theme of remembering a past life through familiar surroundings. SD It has been “five years” since Wordsworth has been to Tintern Abbey, and once he arrives, the recognizable environment is the key that unlocks the memories he made there. CM In the first stanza, he is noticing all of the details of the earth around him and remembering them from years before as he says, “Once again .../ do I behold these steep and lofty cliffs […] Once again I see …/ of sportive wood run wild.” CM The way the “landscape” looked seemed to be the same as it was “five years” before, triggering his memory as he began to remember more than just the lay of the land. SD With this familiar setting bringing back letting Wordsworth reminisce about the time he once spent there, he also remembers how much the place meant to him. CM In the last stanza, Wordsworth states, “That after many wanderings, many years …/ of absence, these steep woods and lofty cliffs …/ and this green pastoral landscape, were to me …/ more dear, both for themselves and for thy sake.” CM By this he means that the “woods” the “cliffs” and “pastoral land” all signified how much this place of tranquility and passiveness benefited his life, and at the same time, he meant just as much to the land as it did to him. CS Surroundings did more than just jog Wordsworths’ memory, reminding him of the time he spent at “Tintern Abbey,” but also prompted how much the place meant to him that long “five years” before.

TS My reaction to entering the halls of Pine Point after five years would be very similar to Wordsworth’s reaction to seeing Tintern Abbey. SD I would recognize all the characteristics of the school, which would then welcome memories of the ten years I spent here to reenter my mind. CM Opening the double doors and stepping into the carpeted hallway would remind me of all the mornings I had been early to school and decided to kill time by dawdling at my locker and taking forever to unpack my book bag. CM My memories would sprout from more than just the vast, obvious features of Pine Point, but also from the things I have grown to notice over the past ten years. CM3 The “First-day-of-school-smell,” the small crevice (FAST) of space between the tall lockers, the mirror in the girls’ bathroom that distorts any body that stares into it and the breeze of warmth that overcomes the student who enters the English room in the wintertime, would all remind me of single, seemingly unimportant moments that have occurred due to each of those places. (Parallelism; Tetracolon Climax) SD Like Wordsworth, the sudden rush of reliving my past would also help me realize how much this school meant to me at the time, and still means to me now. CM In five years, I may have forgotten about all the lessons I learned, pertaining to both academics and life itself. CM Although I may have lost how much I value Pine Point in the shuffle of new textbooks, even longer essays and making new friends, turning back the clock and walking down these halls will awake the sleeping appreciation I have for Pine Point. (Personification) TS Much like Wordsworth, when I venture back to Pine Point in five years, I will be overwhelmed and overjoyed by all that I remember in each step I take down the hallway.

Imagine stepping back in time and returning to that favorite place of yours. What do you see? What do you hear, smell, even taste? Is it the same as you remembered, or so different it is unrecognizable? Either way, embrace the place, love it, remember it, and promise it you’ll never forget it.

*********************************************************************************
Self-Assessment

What Issues Am I Working On?

I am working on using required tools correctly and enhancing my writing with them. I am also working on eliminating unnecessary words and using a variation of short and long sentences. 

What Do I Like Best About This Essay?

I like my use of descriptives. From explaining the theme of "Tintern Abbey" to describing how I will feel in the future when I return to Pine Point after five years, I think I did a good job of giving good imagery while not overusing the adjectives. 

What Is a Possible Weakness I See In This Essay?

I didn't use as many quotes as I would have hoped to, which might make my writing come off as a bit vague. 

Timmy's Last Essay

Timmy O’Brien

Mr. Salsich

English 9

26 May 2009

Remembering is Everything:

An Essay on a Poem and My Experiences

Many things can happen in five years. People can die, or move, or get married, or even give new life [polysyndeton]. After five years, Wordsworth has decided to revisit an old Abbey in England with an old friend of his – his sister. I wonder what can happen to a place I love, such as Pine Point, in the short yet unpredictable time of five years.

In the poem “Tintern Abbey” by William Wordsworth, I see one main theme of remembrance. Wordsworth has come back to visit Tintern Abbey and says that “again [he] hear[s] th[o]se waters.” He remembers everything from five years ago. “The waters…th[o]se steep and lofty cliffs…the landscape…[and a] dark sycamore” are all familiar to him because of his memories. Also, as he sits with his sister along the river, he remembers his old life. “In [her] voice” he hears “the language of [his] former heart, and…former pleasures.” A simple trip into the woods with a dear, old friend helps to bring back not just former memories but even his whole life of childishness. Wordsworth is captivated by not just the beauty of the abbey but is also mystified by its power to bring back what had been lost to him – the thoughts of his old life [appositive].

If I came back to Pine Point in five years, I would hope to see the exact same hustle and bustle of daily life that I can see today. As my days wear on, I will remember Pine Point as a place that is always full of life. Even on the weekends, there are birds to be seen and heard, grass that is as green as ever, and, more often than not, people on the campus striving [FAST] to make the school a better place. People and things that are caught up in “its dizzy raptures” and “aching joys” that can’t help but be happy in the glorious place that is Pine Point. In addition to the desire to see life, I would wish joy upon the place that has given me so much joy. Wordsworth writes that he sometimes turns to Tintern abbey in “joyless daylight,” and I hope that, if for some reason I have lost my joy, I can turn to Pine Point and regain at least some of what I have lost. Pine Point has given me much of what I have, and I can only hope that I do not lose any of it. My only solace [FAST] is that I might be able to achieve “abundant recompence” and gain back the joy that I have lost.

Visiting memories of past places and people is a necessary part of life. It can be a church you once gazed at with awe, or a place that has helped you grow up into the person you are now. Either way, you must reflect on what you would be had they not impacted you. After all, what are you without your memories and past experiences, a simple soulless body with no evident purpose?

Lydia's Last Essay

Lydia Schulz

Mr. H. Salsich

9 English

26 May, 2009

My Dear, Dear Friend:

An Essay on a Poem and Pine Point

      
        It is difficult to describe what it feels like to see a friend after a long time apart. You may feel excitement, happiness, affection, or sentiment (tetracolon). William Wordsworth feels all of these when he visits his old friend after five years, but instead of about a person, he feels them about Tintern Abbey. Wordsworth is clearly sentimental about this place in his poem “Tintern Abbey,” and this is analogous (FAST) how I would feel if I were to return to Pine Point after five long years.
        It is clear that William Wordsworth feels a lot of sentiment and fondness toward Tintern Abbey. One instance in which he shows this is in his repetition of the word “again.” He states, “again I hear these waters,” and, “once again I see these hedge-rows,” showing the word’s importance (participle closer). Wordsworth is remembering how it felt to be in this place and everything that has happened to him in and around the Abbey. Wordsworth also shows his love for the place by calling it, “[his] dearest friend, [his] dear, dear, friend.” Clearly, Wordsworth looks at the Abbey not as a building, but as a companion. Likewise, what he remembers of his experiences there are more meaningful, like a memory you would share with a friend. Finally, Wordsworth refers to the Abbey as his “anchor,” which indicates the solidarity of the place. The Abbey is like a constant and is something he can count on to always be there. No matter what is going on, he can go to the Abbey and reflect. William Wordsworth shows an obvious love for the place in his poem “Tintern Abbey.”
        If I am to return to Pine Point after five years of absence, there is no doubt that I, like Wordsworth, will have missed it. Throughout the years to come, I will undeniably be thinking about the school and my past experiences. I will “oft[en], in spirit, […] turn[…] to [Pine Point],” and like Wordsworth, treat it as a friend. Walking these halls once more, echoes of past experiences and memories of the school will resurface and make me wish to return. However, as much as I may feel sentimental toward this place in which I have grown up, I will need to be reminded that “that time is past.” No matter how much I wish I could go back five years, I cannot, and this will not be the case five years from now. By the time I am twenty years old, the memories of Pine Point will seem like a distant, happy time, and I know I will wish I could do it all again. Upon my return to Pine Point, I am certain I will have mixed, but mostly sentimental, feelings.
        Though my time at Pine Point is almost past, I know it will always be a home to me. Much like William Wordsworth’s sanctuary, Pine Point has been a safe place for me, and will continue to be in years to come. I can only hope that, like Wordsworth, I will have the chance to come back to this place: “my dear, dear friend.”

******************************************

Self-assessment:

1. One of my main issues that I have is that I occasionally don't proofread very well. In this essay, I made a point to read through the entire essay carefully to eliminate careless mistakes. 

2. My favorite thing about this essay was my use of quotes. I feel that all of my quotes are relevant and fit in well with the essay.

3. One weakness I see in this essay is my first body paragraph. I am afraid that I may have been a little repetitive in the first chunk.

Sarahs LAST ESSAY =]

Sarah Shourds
English 09
Hamilton Salsich
26 May 2009

Reminiscing on the Past:

An Essay on Two Poems and Pine Point School

“Five years […], five summers, […] five long winters.” What would you do if you returned to your old school, and it was abandoned? What would you do if you didn’t remember anything about your old school, and when you did, you didn’t care in the least? If I was to visit Pine Point in five years I would probably have the same reaction as William Wordsworth when he visited his beloved, enchanted place- Tintern Abbey.

TS In the poem “Tintern Abbey,” by William Wordsworth, one strong theme is painted into his writing- reminiscing. SD “The day [had] come when [he]” decided to revisit his serene and secluded church. CM Five years had blinded him from his enchanted place, five years grew unwanted grass on the floors, five years abandoned this once famous church. CM “Through a long absence,” his once get-away-escape had transformed from a beautiful, blessed church, to a bare, roofless estate. SD Wordsworth had never truly forgotten about Tintern Abbey, but thinking about those five years that had already passed in which he didn’t visit the church, made him think. CM He would visit the church to get away from everything- to escape from his busy, bustling life [Alliteration]. ÇM He remembers the “feelings […] of unremembered pleasure” that the church and the luscious [FAST] nature around it would vent off, and wishes he would have kept to his tradition of visiting this majestic [FAST] place. CS Sure Wordsworth cannot rewind the last five years and keep to his promise towards the Tintern Abbey, but at least he was able to remember and feel the same tranquil feeling as he did five years ago.

TS Five years from now I hope to come to Pine Point to not only find all of my old teachers, but I want to be able to sit on Doc’s creaky couch, play basketball on the squeaky gym floor, play bongos in Ms. Lozis’s room, and I want to be able to dance across the ever so famous stage. SD All of these places have so much meaning and many memories [Alliteration] built into them. CM “The day [will] come when I [make my voyage back to Pine Point] again [and] repose here.” CM If I was to return and see no stage, no Mr. T, no gym, and no couch or bongos, I would be devastated beyond my capacity. SD Reminiscing on the past would be the only thing that will keep this school alive in my memory, and like Wordsworth, I will have to treasure what’s left of the beauteous landmark even “[t]hough changed, no doubt, from what [it] was.” CM I have been at Pine Point for twelve years and, truthfully, this school just isn’t the same- the Big Toy isn’t lying in the pebbles and the Black Top isn’t being played on anymore [Loose Sentence]. CM After going through these hard changes I’ve learned that changes can be for the better, but you must always prize [FAST] those fond memories you’ve had. CS All of the changes that will happen at Pine Point will be for the better, and we must learn not to carry “the heavy and […] weary weight” of being stuck in the past.

TS In the poem “The Writer” by Richard Wilbur, it has many of the same themes and virtues [FAST] as Wordsworth does in “Tintern Abbey.” SD “[Wilbur] remember[s] the dazed starling[,] which was trapped in that very room” and was “humped and bloody.” CM This small remembrance stayed fastened in his memories- the “iridescent creature” flies through his thoughts. SD One day he “hear[s] […] a commotion of type-writer keys” from his daughter’s bedroom and it brings him back to the very day “the dazed starling” entered his heart. CM Every pause his daughter made brought him back to when he doubted the bird’s health and boldness [FAST]. CM Every swipe of the type-writer brings him back to that vivid scene in his mind, almost as though he is portraying his daughter as the “iridescent creature.” CS This “starling” has taught Wilbur to never give up on himself, no matter how tough the situation. CS2 Even if a vivid scenery in his mind has changed overtime into his daughters life, he must learn to trust her bravery and freedom and let her “lift[] off from [his memories] […and] beat a smooth course for the right window.”

Small, pointless objects found anywhere can trigger my memory of Pine Point School. I hope to never lose any of the lessons I’ve learned here or any of the memories I’ve made here. I know that Pine Point will change immensely [FAST] over the next few years, but I hope to be like Wordsworth- come back to this wondrous place and take in all of the fond memories I’d had there. “Nor wilt thou then forget, that after many wanderings, many years of absence, [this school] were to me more dear, both for themselves and for thy sake!”

***************************************************************************

Self Assessment

1.) In this essay I was working on sticking to the point, and using the tools efficiently. I normally stick in tools out of place, or stick them in incorrectly. In this essay, I just wrote it through and picked out tools I thought worked.

2.) I liked my extra credit body paragraph. I think I used brief quotes accordingly and styed on focus. I also liked my opening paragraph- using two questions will keep the reader thinking.

3.) My weakness in this essay would have to be my concluding paragraph. I had a hard time summarizing everything, since there was so much material.

Timmy's Essay 20

Timmy O’Brien
Mr. Salsich
English 9
13 May 2009

Hands are the Biggest Burdens of All:

An Essay on a Quote, a Garden Stone, and my Life

When you first acquire a new object or machine, you cannot properly use it. You have to take some time to get to know it; you could read the manual or just play around with it. No matter what, you will soon be able to control your object in a masterful manner by never turning down a new piece of information about how to better use it. Rilke believes that hands are like this to humans, which connects to a stone from the garden and the game of lacrosse.

In a quote by Rainer Maria Rilke beginning with “Seeing is for us…” there are many underlying meanings. To start, Rilke talks about “our hands” being “coffin[s]” that trap what we hold. He says that if we cannot learn to let go of what our hands long to keep with them, we cannot continue to learn. When eyes see, they do not keep that instant of vision with them because they must let it go in order to attain [FAST] more sights, and, in turn, they become more knowledgeable. If we cannot learn to do this, we cannot “truly acquire wealth.” Our hands must learn to let the things they cherish go. For example, when someone picks up a bird or bug to study, they must let it go eventually to go search for something different to look at, giving them a chance to gain wealth in the form of knowledge [participle as a sentence closer]. Our hands are very important to the way we live, but they could be more important if we could teach them to hold on to nothing and let go of everything [antithesis].

Upon first glance, Rilke’s quote does not have much in common with the garden stone, but if one digs deeper, a myriad [FAST] of mysteries are unveiled. Rilke wishes that our hands were “willing to relinquish all things,” which we have not yet been able to do, but this is a possibility for the garden stone. The rock has already “relinquish[ed]” everything, owning nothing to begin with [participle phrase as a closer]. It is therefore in the perfect place to take everything in and acquire the maximum amount of wealth possible for a stone of its stature. In addition, Rilke states that we can only gain wealth “by letting everything pass through [our] grasp” like it is a “festive gate of return and homecoming.” While it was still part of the path, the stone was that “festive gate” because people walked over it everyday on their way into the school. It had all the people in its grasp but let them go in the same manner – quickly, quietly, freely, happily [tetracolon climax and asyndeton]. An innocent yet knowing object, this garden stone has “acquire[d] wealth” through measures beyond its control, the simple act of people passing by and leaving their knowledge in their footsteps on the dirty stone path.

Rilke’s talks about things “pass[ing] through” everyone’s “grasp” so that we can have space to learn more, which relates to my lacrosse career. Whenever the lacrosse ball is passed to me, I have to let go of it somehow. I can pass it, shoot it, or drop it. No matter which way I choose, the game continues on. If our hands do not let things pass through them, they cannot learn to their full potential, which is like lacrosse because things have to keep moving. A fast-paced and physical sport, lacrosse does not live up to its full potential when the ball is stationary [appositive as a sentence opener]. If someone is passed the ball, and they stand still, waiting for things to happen without making a move themselves, the game will be very boring for spectators and players alike. Hands must learn to give things up in order to take on new ones, and lacrosse must be a game of teamwork and moving the ball unless you want the game to go nowhere.

Hands are a vital part of our lives, but we don’t use them very well. If they sometimes forgot their original purpose to hold things and let information pass through, we could live in a different way. Your hands could let information pass over them like a stone at the entrance to a path or a lacrosse ball being passed over and over again during a game. In the grand scheme of things, do your hands help your acquiring of wealth, or do they hinder it?

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Self Assessment

Q:What was the hardest part of this assignment for you?

A: It was hard for me to get all my thoughts down in a somewhat organized manner.

Q: What is your greatest strength in this essay?

A: I think I used most of my special tools well. They were in the right places and had the meaning I wanted.

Lydia's Essay 20

Lydia Schulz

Mr. H. Salsich

9 English

May 22, 2009

A Life Changing Occurance:

An Essay on a Passage, a Stone, and My Life

        Nothing is ever done the same way twice. Every occurrence is a unique and unmatched event, and because of this, we cannot afford to let them slip by. We must take full advantage of every opportunity and treat it as it deserves to be treated- important and irreplaceable. In a passage by Rainer Maria Rilke, in a flat garden stone, and in my own life, these slices of wisdom hold true.
        In this passage by Rainer Maria Rilke, two sentences in particular stood out. Rilke states that life is transformation, and “for this, he is in the right who encounters everything as something that will not return.” This means that we should take advantage of everything that comes our way- love it, learn it, experience it, appreciate it (tetracolon climax and asyndeton)- because you never know when something will disappear. We should make the most of the present before it slips away. In the beginning of this passage, Rilke says that “life is transformation,” and that all aspects of life change. Your very existence is constantly shifting and manipulating (FAST) itself into something different, whether it is for better or for worse. These alterations can easily go unnoticed, but they are nonetheless important. In his somewhat Buddhist philosophies, Rilke expresses many essential pieces of wisdom in life.
        Unlike life, a stone never changes. Stone is ancient; every stone you see has come from the monstrous rocks formed billions of years ago (loose sentence). The elements may erode this sturdy form into smaller boulders and rock, but the material itself is always the same. A piece of gravel you pick up from the ground may be millions of years old, but because of its unchanged appearance, you would never know. The same goes for this garden stone, and yet, it contradicts itself. Stone does change, breaking and crumbling and being compressed to form another stone(participle as sentence closer). It’s slate gray color telling the story of its past, this garden stone was cut to become something new, transforming it (appositive as sentence opener). The material itself never changes, but the stone is always changing (antithesis).
        In this passage, Rilke says that “he is in the right who encounters everything as something that will not return,” a philosophy I try to remember every day. One goal I have for myself is that I will be able to look back on my life without regrets. I know that this is difficult to accomplish and I will inevitably regret something, but I want to endeavor (FAST) to live every moment as if it were my last. I would like to look back on the messes I have gotten myself into and know that although they got me in trouble, they were worth it. Recently, I came to the realization that our class will never be a class again. Although this thought scares me, it has reminded me that our time together is limited and that we should appreciate every opportunity we get. We should make our last few weeks at Pine Point the best and take full advantage of each other’s company. Every time we remark on how we are sick of Pine Point, we should remember to appreciate it while it lasts, because we won’t get a second chance.
        You may never know how things might have been, but why wonder when you could experience it for yourself? If you take advantage of every situation, you will never be able to look back on your life with “what if’s.” These decisions can change everything, contributing to the swirling and stirring of the concoction that is our lives. Even something as simple as a garden stone has gone through the shifting process because, as Rilke states, “life is transformation.”